The People's Republic of Arzolvakia is a huge, efficient nation, ruled by Glorious Leader Danyik Nolshkavic with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory military service, absence of drug laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 807 million Arzolvakians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Neu Arzol. The average income tax rate is 55.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Arzolvakian economy, worth 103 trillion Arzolvakian Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 128,155 Arzolvakian Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

People regularly disappear off the streets and all evidence of them is destroyed, the Arzolvakia Enquirer offers weekly cash prizes for 'most blasphemous song, story, or cartoon', young girls aren't having a ball but they are enjoying themselves, and gossip magazines have pictures of Glorious Leader Danyik Nolshkavic sunbathing on the beach with political rivals. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Arzolvakia's national animal is the deer, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Arzolvakia is ranked 64,838^th in the world and 92^nd in The Kodiak Republic for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 4,233.66 on the Hickory Productivity Index.