The Nation formally by the name of 9003 is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Zombie Goblin with an iron fist, and renowned for its fear of technology, compulsory military service, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 18.512 billion public filth are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, although Industry and Administration are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Angband. The average income tax rate is 1.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Slave to the man economy, worth a remarkable 5,536 trillion gold bars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 299,097 gold bars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.3 times as much as the poorest.

State officials tend to disappear after they forget to salute The Zombie Goblin's portrait, Human is one of the most popular forenames in 9003, foreign militias and child smuggling rings will always love The Zombie Goblin, and the food pyramid has been replaced with the word PASTA in bold block capital letters. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. 9003's national animal is the human, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is 9002ism.

9003 is ranked 244,920^th in the world and 9,458^th in The North Pacific for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring -19.8 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.